Monday, March 18, 2013

Writing process essay- Đinh Thị Ngọc Chi

VERSION 1:
Nowadays, shopping online is more and more popular because of its convenience. However, to many people who find it hard to use the internet to buy items online, it’s a complicated process. In this essay, I will give some instructions about how to buy products and services from hotdeal.vn, one of the most chosen sites by Vietnamese online shoppers.
The first step is to check for the products you want. Type in the navigation bar “hotdeal.vn” and you are welcomed to hotdeal.vn site. Choose the city you’re living and all the deals will be shown on the screen. There are many categories of products and services displayed such as “apparel”, “foods and drinks”, “hi tech”, “spa and beauty”, “entertainment”, etc… Choose the type of goods you want and click the deal.
The next step is to make an order. If you are happy and satisfied with the deal, click “buy”. After that, choose number of products/services and click “pay”. If you have a hotdeal account, log in and go to the next step. If you don’t have one, register for an account. Just fill in the blank all the required information for example: name, address, telephone number…and u will have a new account in 1 minute.
The last step is finishing your deal. Just choose one of the methods of payment: by bank account or by cash (home delivery) and at last, click “pay” at the bottom of the page. The deal has been successfully ordered. Now what you have to do is to wait for a call from hotdeal employee telling you that your products arrived at your house!!
Through the steps I listed above, I’m sure that everyone can easily make an order online and get the goods successfully. Shopping online will never be a difficult for new online shoppers.




VERSION 2:

Nowadays, shopping online is more and more popular because of its convenience. However, to many people who find it hard to use the internet to buy items online, it’s a complicated process. In this essay, I will give some instructions about how to buy products and services from hotdeal.vn, one of the most chosen sites by Vietnamese online shoppers.
The first step is to check for the products you want. Type in the navigation bar “hotdeal.vn” and you are welcomed to hotdeal.vn site. Choose the city you’re living and all the deals will be shown on the screen. There are many categories of products and services displayed such as “apparel”, “foods and drinks”, “hi tech”, “spa and beauty”, “entertainment”, etc… Choose the type of goods you want and click the deal.
The next step is to make an order. If you are satisfied with the deal, click “buy”. After that, choose the number of products/services and click “pay”. If you have a hotdeal account, log in and go to the next step. If you don’t have one, register for an account. Just fill in the blank all the required information for example: name, address, telephone number…and you will have a new account in 1 minute.
The last step is finishing your deal. Just choose one of the methods of payment: by bank account or by cash (home delivery) and at last, click “pay” at the bottom of the page. The deal has been successfully ordered. Now what you have to do is to wait for a call from a hotdeal employee telling you that your products arrived at your house!!
Through the steps I listed above, I’m sure that everyone can easily make an order online and get the goods successfully. Shopping online will never be a difficulty for new online shoppers.

2 comments:

  1. Hi there,
    After reading your writing, i have some following comments for you.In the whole, you did a good job. All the steps are very clear and easy to follow. The essay is organized very well and clearly,seperated into 3 different parts like the standard organization of the process essay.In ađition, the transition sentences is used very fluently. However, there're still some small mistake such as punctuation (line 13, after "informtaion for" )or abbreviation (line 13 "u" ) . These mistakes doesn't affect much to the quality of your writing. Anyway, keep hard working.

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  2. I have read your essay and have some following comments :
    First of all, I’m very impressive by your professional writing style, it contains deep business features. Your essay is very clear and easy to understand due to your well- preparation.
    However, there is a minor mistake that some structures are repeated such as :” if you” in the 2nd step or word form in the last passage “difficult”.
    keep your level!
    Best regard,
    Gam

    ReplyDelete