VERSION
1
Shopping online
nowadays becomes so popular that everyone can purchase themselves any item they
want to without coming to stores or supermarket. As its convenience and
efficiency, more and more people are using it as an useful device to buy items.
Among these websites, Amazon.co.uk is a well-known website that help customers
to purchase products easily with various kinds of products. There are many
steps that customers should follow when shopping on this site.
The first step is logging in the
Amazon.co.uk. If you don't have an account, you won't be able to get the products
, therefore, you have to create a new account by click in 'sign in' and then
select 'new customer? start here'. After that, to search the products, you need
to enter the name of products you want to buy in the blank of 'Search" and
this will let you save time on approaching to your products. An other way is
choosing items by selecting specific product categories such as Electronics,
Bestsellers, Deals, TVs, Camera and Photo, Phones, ect. If you still wonder
about the product, you can read more information by choosing 'See details and
information' to make sure that it is exactly what you want.
The second phase is buying the products.
If you definitely want to purchase and satisfy with the products, look to the
right and you will see the quantity box. Enter the number of product you want
to buy and click 'add to basket' or 'add to wish list' that will help your
friends and family shop for you later. In case you want to delete the products
from your basket, just choose 'edit your basket' and continue to purchase
others.
The third step is when finishing adding
items, you have to complete your shopping by checking out. Click 'proceed to
check out' then choose way to dispatch your order and methods of payment. At
last, before leaving, review your order and click 'place your order' to
finish. After all, your order has been done successfully.
In sum, Amazon.co.uk is a huge online
shopping mall that anyone can access and purchase a large quantity of qualified
products. Only with three simple steps, you will have your products shipped to
your home in a very short time.
VERSION 2
Shopping online
nowadays becomes so popular that everyone can purchase themselves any item they
want to without coming to stores or supermarket. Due to its convenience and
efficiency, more and more people are consider it as an useful device to buy
items which they want. Amazon.co.uk is one of the most well-known websites that
help customers to purchase products easily with various kinds of products.
There are many steps that customers should follow when shopping on this site.
The first step is
logging in the address http://Amazon.co.uk. This
is compulsory for customers if they want to get the products. In case you don't
have an account, you won't be able to take the items to your basket. Therefore,
you need to create a new account by click in 'sign in' and then select 'new
customer? start here'. After that, to search the products, you enter the name
of products you want to buy in the blank of 'Search" at the top of the
website. This saves you a lot of time on approaching to your products. An other
way to find products is choosing items by selecting specific product categories
in the left such as Electronics, Books, Computers and Office, TVs, Toys,
Children and Baby, Clothes, Shoes and Watches, ect. If you still wonder about
the product or you want to know more about it, you can read more information by
choosing the function 'See details and
information' to make sure that it is exactly what you want.
The second phase is buying the products. If
you definitely want to purchase and satisfy with the products, look to the
right and you will see the quantity box. Enter the number of products you want
to purchase and click 'add to basket' or 'add to wish list' which records what you want to buy in the initial
access and will help your friends and family shop for you later. In case you
want to delete the products from your basket or change the quantity, just
choose 'edit your basket' and continue
to purchase others.
The third step is checking out to complete
your shopping when finishing adding items. Click 'proceed to check out' then choose
a suitable way to dispatch your order and methods of payments. Amazon payments
accepts verified bank accounts, credit cards or customers’ Amazon account
balance. At last, before leaving, customers should review the order and then click
'place your order' to finish. After all, your order has been done successfully.
In sum, Amazon.co.uk is a huge online shopping
mall that anyone can access and purchase a large quantity of qualified
products. Only with three simple steps logging in, buying products and checking
out, you will have your products shipped to your home in a very short
time.
after reading your process essay, i have some comments for you :
ReplyDeletefirst, the essay listed and defined the items. materials tools and preparations needed to carry out it. the introduction contains all the neccesary elements : background information, thesis. moreover, the essy is well-organized. all the steps is clear. however, in my opinion, in the first step, you should give customers some examples to help them understand easily.
that's all. i hope that it's useful for your essay.
commented by Bui Thi Loan
hi Trang,
ReplyDeleteafter reading your process easy, I have some the following comments.
For strong points:
- your using transition sentences between each paragraph is smooth.
- I like your conclusion part.
- your essay is well-organization
For weak points:
- you should more consider about how to organize sentences, choose words
+ Shopping online nowadays becomes so popular that every can purchase themselves "any item" (I think you don't use "any" here, but use "many or some" and "items" with "s") they want "to" (not "to") without coming to stores or supermarket.
+ "Among these websites, Amazon.co.uk is a well-known website that ..." (it's better when you use structure "Amazon.co.uk is one of the most famous websites all over the world that...).
+ you should write the website or the full mane of website, not just write "Amazon.com"
+ before "therefore" you have to use semicolon (;)
+ I think u don't express like "this will let you save time on approaching to your products" -> "and thereby, u can save a lot of time to approach..."
+ I'm quite confused when read the sentence "click 'add to basket' or 'add to wish list' that will help your friends and family shop for you later". in version 2, could u explain that step in detail.
+ "the number of product" -> "product" with "s"
+ "The third step is when finishing adding items, you have to complete your shopping by checking out" should rewrite "the third step is checking out before finishing your shopping"
+ "Only with three simple steps, you will have your products shipped to your home in a very short time" -> "Only with three simple steps, will you have your products shipped to your home in a very short time.
- about introduction part, it's impossible that u add sentence "As its convenience and efficiency, more and more people are using it as an useful device to buy items"
- in the beginning of each paragraph, maybe, u forgot explain the importance of each step. u should add it to your version 2.
thank you for your reading. I hope that some my comments will help you improve your version 2.
thanks a lot for your useful comments. i will revise all the mistakes and improve my writing in the second version.
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