Entry 1_Hoang Thi Trang
Item 1: Poem
Path Of Peace
Peace is an easy path to tread
Peace is where our fears are mislaid
Peace is beginning to restore
Peace for each man, woman and child
Peace for the troubled streets gone wild
Peace is for the old and the young
Peace in the end will overcome
Peace builds trust into a lifestyle
Peace is a friendly open hand
Peace is a place to understand
Peace in the end will overcome
Peace is for the old and the young
Peace is a legacy to leave
Peace is when we don't have to grieve
Peace is an end to all the hate
Peace is why we negotiate
Peace for all the victims of war
Source: http://www.poemhunter.com/poem/path-of-peace/
Rhetorical
devices:
·
Repetition:
peace is, peace for, peace is for the old and the young
·
Rhyme:
tread-mislaid, child-wild, young-come, hand-stand, overcome-young,
leave-grieve, hate-negotiate
·
Metaphor:
peace-an easy path, peace-a friendly open hand, peace-a legacy to leave
·
Parallelism: in structure 'peace is'
Message:
peace is harmony with the absence of violent conflict or war. Everyone has the right to enjoy it from a small child to an old woman. Peace makes our life more beautiful, helps people to be closer and overcome all the pain.
Item 2: Picture
Rhetorical devices:
Metaphor:
- The man – all the people, companies or factories that cause environmental pollution (air pollution)
- The smoke – industrial activities that produce a lot of smoke and dust
- The glass house – what human have done for the Earth to protect it
Item 3: Cartoon
source: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U30KkR8FiCI
Rhetorical devices:
Metaphor:
- the top of the mountain: success that man can achieve
- the way to the top: the way people do to gain successes
Dear Trang,
ReplyDeleteAfter i've read your post, i have some comments as follow:
About the first item, the poem related to the peace. I think that overall you indicated all the rhetorical devices exactly; however, in my opinion, " tread" and "mislaid" dont rhyme.In addition to your message, I recommend that this song just be a piece of advice that people should make a peaceful world instead of causing
wars.
At the second item, i have no comment on rhetorical devices but in the terms of message, i think you need study more deeply the "root" of this problem. It not only the critises human's activities destroying the environment but also shows how hard people must be to cope with that destruction.
About the last item,why dont you appreciate the patience of this man? This is one of the most important characteristics to succeed.
In conclusion, Your items are quite interesting in contents. I like them.
Commented by : Lê Ngọc Xuân Mai
dear Trang,
ReplyDeleteafter reading your entry, i have some comments as following:
at the fist item, i think "peace is" is the repetition here, not parallelism. and the rest of item 1 is ok.
at the second item, you should explain clearly the smile on the face of the man. it is very mysterious.
at item 3, i don not have any comment.
hope you will be better at the next entry.
commented by: Nguyen Thi Thoan
Hi Trang,here are some of my comments after reading your entry:
ReplyDelete1. Item 1: It can't be denied that the poem is very great and meaningful as well.This is a poem that is easy to indicate all the rhetorical devices and i have to say that you do this task really well. However, i agree with Xuan Mai's comment when saying that "tread" and "mislaid" don't make rhyme.
2. Item 3: I really like your video. It's such a deeply meaningful about success. However about the message that you point you, once again i have the same thinking with Mai. I think that this video reminds us of patience to be success. Don't waste too much time on considering how long you will reach it, just always keep trying and trying.
I hope that these comments above will be helpful for you in some ways!
Hi Trang,
ReplyDeleteGenerally, your entry is well-done. I have only some little comments that;
- Item 2:
Rhetorical devices:
+ Symbol ( the sphere is sweating- the Earth is warming, the glass house-the phenomenon of green house, smoke- pollutants, the man- industry sector)
+ Metaphor (the man’s smile- people’s indifference)
Message:
Even though the Earth is polluted seriously, industrial areas still have indifference and continue releasing pollutants.
- Item 3:
- Rhetorical devices:
+ Metaphor ( the water and gifts- the esteem value and happiness people will gain when reaching the success)
On the whole, I believe you can do better next time!
Dear Trang,
ReplyDeleteI have some comments to share with you after reading your entry:
-- Item 1: the poem in this item is not special but also significant. I and everyone can mostly acquire the message and have more awareness of peaceful manifestation. I'm also impressed by the repetition which make the poem become more rhythmically.
-- Item 2: the polluted surrounding environment has being debated for a very long time as a hot problem. The picture describes the reality of people's behaviors affecting our surroundings. well done!
-- Item 3: in my opinion, this video can be better if you mention in detail which elements helping to succeed.
thanks for reading my comment.
(commented by: Nguyen Thi Hong Quynh)